MY STORY Part V

Once the cab stopped at the taxi stand,took out a ten ringgit note, told the driver to keep the change and rushed out to the pavement. While walking, I could hear bustling of people rushing to their offices like me. Looking around, I saw everyday familiar faces smiling at me. Smiled back and nod my head to them signalling I am already late for work. I reached the office door, the company security guard waved and opened the door for me.

"Aren't you late today...how come?" Siva asked with a wide grin appear on his face. Siva has been working with The Reading Space ever since he was 18years old, so basicly he knows every person in this company although there are more 100 people working under the same roof.

"Morning Siva,has Aida came in yet?" I asked while writing down my attendance and get myself check by a lady security.

"No..no..not yet. Maybe she still at the parking lot," said Siva with his Tamil slang,shaking his head and winked at me.

"Hahahaha..alright then. See you around and thanks Siva," I said laughingly.



I went straight to my table. For that moment, I realised I have not been thinking about Jann and her mysterious cousin,Cate. I looked around and somehow or rather the office is seem very extraordinary silence today.

"Why is it the office so quiet today?" I asked Zaharah, my assistant whom somehow staring at the paper she was holding.

"Oh..hi there,Ayesha..Quiet? Really? I didn't realised it either. You just came in? Madam was looking for you just now,asking about the shipment that you rejected before you went on leave. She wants the report on her table tomorrow morning, how was your dad?" said Zaharah,still staring at her document.

"So far he's at home and under observation by mum of course.Hmmm.. I'll get the report done by today. Where is everybody anyway?" I asked realising that all my clerks are not around.

"Briefing on the product knowledge outside " Zaharah answered whom still staring at the paper she's holding. Getting very impatient with her character, I snapped.

"Oi...what is that you holding and staring? You seem like in dazed. What's up?" I asked her with a frown on my face. She just shrugged her shoulder and give a loud sighed. She looked at me and then she looked down again at the paper. Ever since I start to work for this bookstore, never once I heard that Zaharah not without a problem. Seems like she attracted too much of negative vibes from outside the world. Looking at her now, I knew there is something wrong.

"What is wrong Zah?" I asked still a frowned on my face. She moved from her sit and came to my table. I looked up and waiting patiently for her reply. She keep on playing with the paper in her hand. After so many sighing and shrugging at last she opened her mouth and told me.

"Ayesha,don't get shock alright..hmm.. I'm pregnant..." she said not daring to look at me eye to eye.

"YOU WHAT????", I was basicly half screaming my heads off. I could not believe this. Zaharah was supposed to leave the husband. Seeing the fear on Zaharah eyes, I tried to calmed down.

"Geez Zah...aren't you supposed to leave him? How the heck you can get yourself pregnant? Did he gave you drugs or something?" I know I shouldn't interfered with Zaharah marital problems but I don't think I should pretend that she wasn't basicly a victim of physical abused can I?

"Gotten me drunk more like it. Look, it was my fault too alright. We went clubbing together, drinking and dancing so one thing leads to another. So....you know..."she went scarlet when she told me this. I sighed and shaked my head. I start to tidy my table and switched on the computer when Zaharah sort of starting to cry. Now why is she crying?

"Please don't judge me,Ayesha. I know it was a mistake but he is after all my husband" she said with a tear falling down at her cheek.

I looked up, rather staying angry with her, suddenly I felt pity. Pitied for women who no choice to fulfilled the husband demands whether she wants too or not. Obligations...so it seems. I got up and leaned beside her. I took a deep breath and put my arms around her shoulders.

"Zah, I know this is not my business and I will not intefere about this whole pregnancy thing but if somehow or rather, he lays his hand on you again I swear to God, I will go to police and report him and at the same time,I'll grab my sofball bat and smash his head off to give his brain some clear view what has he done to you. Is that clear?" I said with a warning tone and gave her warm smile. She nods and smiled at me.
"Thanks Ayesha" she said and walked back to her place.

When I looked at her, I have always wonder, why does woman always becomes so weak when it comes to husband even though how bad the husband is treating her. Why can't they just walked away? Was it love or the idea of being alone without companion scares them? Mostly I will get the answer from the married women, they stay on because of the children. Claiming they stay on because of the children, refuses to let the children to be fatherless.But yet, doesn't it will deprived the children childhood if they keep on being the spectators of their fathers beating of their mothers? Ted Bundy became a serial killer murdering hundreds of women due to his father was so violent towards him and family. Why can't some women sees that? Too many cases and evidence proving violent parenthood leads to bad future for their children. I looked again at Zaharah, can't she see that?

At that moment, something triggered me. What if Jann left me? Will I become weak and desperate for attention or put on brave face and be on my own? Seriously, it had never crossed my mind. I never once been dumped by someone,dumping people is more to my criteria. How exactly will I react if Zaharah situations is reversed towards me?

Suddenly a shrieking voice came out from nowhere make me jumped.
"Ayesha! can you call Aida and ask her where she is? She is supposed to be in charge of the cash register this morning and the shop is opening within 20 minutes for god sake!"Rozana, our dear chief cashier were shouting her lungs out at me due to her irritation feeling of Aida being late...yet again.

I nodded my head and started to dial Aida's number. The phone rang once and already Aida answered her phone. Before I could say anything, Aida shouted "I'm at the parking lot! Be there in a sec..."then the phone was off again. I looked around and saw Rozana raise one eyebrow at me. I realised that I put on loudspeaker so due to my understanding, there is no need for me to tell Rozana what Aida reply was. I grinned at Rozana and she just shaked her head and walk off to her little office.

When I turned around, I saw all my clerks already at their table continuing their work. I sat at my table checked through all my emails when suddenly someone burst in at the door. Who else if not our famous latecomer and my dear friend, Aida. I grinned when I saw her panicking through the door.
"Damn it, damn it...I'm late" she said grinning at me.
"Yet again...what's new?" I said with a chuckled from my voice. She glared at me and went to her locker.
"How was your dad?" she asked rummaging through her bag looking for her keys.
"Surviving as usual, he will be fine, insya ALLAH" I said waiting for her to finish whatever she's doing at the locker. I badly need to talk to her but obviously not a very good timing with her coming late to work. Guess I need to wait until we off from work.
"Hey Aida,do you think we can hang out after work today?" I asked her after she had already locked up her things. She came up to my table, grab some of my breads that I brought from my house earlier on.
"Sure thing..got latest super delicious hot story I assumed?" she asked grinning at me.
I chuckled and said "Steaming hot on fire stove more like it" rolling my eyes at her.
"Hahahahah...alright then. Guess I have to go to and see the Ice Queen now " she said with a wide grin on her face.

The day passes so quickly. So many reports and paperwork to be done. Zaharah bought me some lunch from the foodcourt and I ate while I work. Collegues came and disturb me, eat my bread, drinking my drinks, finish up my snacks and continue doing their work. Sometimes it does irritates me but somehow or rather I feel warm around them. Irritating but fun to be with.They love to hear me screaming my heads off whenever someone sat on my chair or finishes my food or even some stocks belonging to their department are not stock properly in the warehouse. I was known to be very tempermental when it comes to work but well, it never bothers them of my unstable character. They will find their ways to accomodate me. Basicly, we worked together like a irritating and annoyingly happy family.

I was so engrossed with my work when suddenly Aida grab a chair and sat beside me at the table.
"So, what story morning glory?" she asked sipping my Coke.
"Is it 6 pm already?" I asked looking at my watch. She nodded and silently eating my peanuts.

Suddenly, at that moment I realised something. Something that has become a routine but somehow or rather that routine is not been done today. The routine that has kept me and Jann closer. Phone calls. Jann has not called me at all today. Not even a single phone calls or message from her. Very unusual behaviour. I realised I start to sweat and my hands start to shake again. I closed my eyes and start to control myself from shaking.

"Ayesha? What's wrong? Are you okay?" Aida asked with concern in her voice.
I opened my eyes and looked up to her. With a deep breath and trembling lips, I answered
"Aida...I think Jann has someone else" I said with a fear in my eyes. Aida was dumbfounded and she stop munching the peanuts even though her hand already half way to her mouth.
Silently, I looked at her with a pleading eyes. Aida got up from her sit and held my hand.
"Let's go and have some coffee and talk" she said. I am not sure how pale my face was but Aida does look worried. I was frozen at my sit. I am not able to move, not even an inch. I was shaking from head to toe.
At that moment, I knew...I knew, my fear and suspicion is coming back.